Insomnia

It's 1:32am and I can't sleep. I haven't felt much like doing anything the past few days, so I guess that's why I haven't posted. It's been really hard to have this much time on my hands. Even though there is a ton of stuff I could be doing, I just plain don't feel like doing it. I need that nesting instinct to come on full force!!

I had my doc appointment last Thursday, and the good news is that my blood presssure came down. He told me that the decision to take me out of work early was the right one to make. One thing that I did NOT want to hear is that I had gained another 4 pounds in one week. Ugh!!! He said it was all water retention, and I believe him. I've lost just about all feeling in both of my hands due to this pregnancy carpal tunnel, and by the end of the day my feet and legs are so swollen. I was going to take a picture of them the other night to post, but I was too embarrassed! I'm hoping that weight comes off pretty fast after the birth. I'm actually looking forward to getting myself back in shape...I lost so much weight right before I got pregnant, and I want to keep going!

Did you guys know that swimming is supposed to help you with water gain? It does something like compress your cells, and it makes you pee more. Go figure. I tried to go down to the pool today, and it was closed. :( Maybe tomorrow.

Besides my BP being normal, there were no other changes from the previous week. Still 10% effaced, not dilated, and the baby is coming down. I have a feeling that will change by my appointment this Thursday, because the past few days I've felt stronger contractions and I'm feeling a lot of pressure near the "exit".

Okay, so one of the reasons why I can't sleep is because I've just been feeling so sorry for myself lately. It's really easy to do when you have a lot of time on your hands and nothing is on TV. First, I feel like I'm really missing out on something not having a separate room for the baby. I know that's stupid, but it's how I feel. There's no proper place to put anything, and I just feel like I'm missing out on the whole decorating thing. I'm really missing my old apartment right now. That apartment would have been perfect. The other reason I'm feeling sorry for myself is because I've been watching "A Baby Story" and I'm just so sick and tired of seeing all of these loving husbands being supportive. I want to see an episode where a single woman gives birth. And not a lesbian. I want to see someone in MY situation, and I want to see that everything is okay. Jennifer will be there, as will my parents, so I do have family and friends that will be there for me, but it's just not the same. Or maybe it will be. I just don't know. Plus, I'm just plain worried about the future. How is the baby going to change my relationships with everyone? Ugh. Now I'm getting upset again. All of this crying can't be good for the baby.

On a lighter note, here are some pics of the crib that my parents bought me:

So, that's pretty much the update. I lay on the couch a lot, I cry a lot, I try to drink lots of water. I feel like I weigh 500 pounds, and my hands hurt like hell. Jealous? :)